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justfun14 (the best headlines for 2007 ** )

The Best Headlines for 2007!

The following headlines actually appeared in newspapers in 2007.  The comments in parentheses are editorial comments, not part of the headline.

v   Crack found on governor’s daughter   (that must have hurt!)

v   Something went wrong in jet crash, expert says   (no kidding!)

v   Police begin campaign to run down jaywalkers   (that’s a bit harsh, don’t you think?)

v   Panda mating fails; veterinarian takes over   (service above and beyond the call of duty!)

v   Miners refuse to work after death   (those lazy bums!)

v   Juvenile court to try shooting defendant   (we’ll see that justice is served one way or another!)

v   War dims hope for peace  (not hard to imagine it might have that effect)

v   If strike isn’t settled quickly, it may last awhile  (go figure)

v   Cold wave linked to temperatures   (who would have thought?)

v   London couple slain; police suspect homicide  (they may be on to something)

v   Red tape holds up new bridges   (surely the red tape is not as strong as duct tape!)

v   Man struck by lightning: he faces battery charge   (he probably IS the battery charge!)

v   New study on obesity looks for larger test group   (the first group wasn’t large enough?)

v   Astronaut takes blame for gas in spacecraft  (beans and spacecraft obviously don’t mix)

v   Kids make nutritious snacks   (taste like chicken?)

v   Local high school dropouts cut in half   (yet another chainsaw massacre?)

v   Hospital sued by 7 foot doctors   (those are some tall doctors!)

v   Typhoon rips through cemetery: hundreds dead   (great, now where do we bury them?)

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