Urethral embarrassment — 1976
I have placed myself in many embarrassing situations during my life, but in 1976 I experienced an incredibly embarrassing predicament over which I had no control. During my work as an orderly at Utah Valley Hospital, I became certified to place urethral (bladder) catheters in male patients at the hospital. Early in my catheter-placing career, while still somewhat apprehensive about my skill at this procedure, I was called to a room on the medical floor to place a catheter late one evening. Having gathered my necessary equipment, I strode into the patient’s room and found myself face-to-face with my Branch President, who will remain unnamed. I was at that time serving as Sunday School President in our branch, and thus knew this branch president quite well. Blood drained from both of our faces as we nervously greeted each other. I knew there was no other orderly in the hospital to call upon because of the late hour. I was mortified. Having explained the situation and the procedure to the branch president, I haltingly proceeded. As I feared, things didn’t go well. Because of nervousness or inexperience or both, I didn’t insert the catheter all the way into the bladder before inflating the small balloon on the catheter tip, and my branch president yelled in pain as the balloon dilated his urethra. Eventually, I succeeded in placing the catheter properly, much to the physical relief of the patient and the mental relief of one contrite orderly. I mumbled an apology and a wish for a speedy recovery and made a hasty retreat from the room. The branch president soon recovered from his malady and returned to preside over our branch, but I found it difficult to look him in the eyes for several weeks.
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