jamestalk10272024

This talk was given by my wonderful son, James, in his St. George ward on Sunday, October 27, 2024.  Never has a father been more proud of a son than I was on this day.

Good morning, brothers and sisters.  My name is James Taylor, and my wife Cheyenne will be speaking after me.  We have a little boy named Hazer.  The beautiful song you just heard was sung by our sweet friend, Cami, who lives with us.

Most speakers try to have a joke as they begin to speak to break the ice, so I tried to think of one, but I felt that it was too inappropriate, so I asked the bishop if he had a joke I could share.  Now I have two inappropriate jokes that I can’t share with you.

The past session of general conference had so many good talks.  The ones that stood out to me the most were the ones about being forgiven and the atonement.  I have a very strong testimony of the atonement and the Savior’s redeeming love.  A very specific experience that I went through regarding forgiveness was when I was getting ready to go on my mission.  I did all the things that were required.  I went through the temple and took out my endowments.  I made my covenants and was doing everything I could to get ready to go on my mission, but my personal life choices that I was making were not what they should have been to prepare myself for my mission.  As I went to the MTC, I make it through the first week and was feeling okay about being there, and then the second week hit and I don’t know if it was the spiritual power of the MTC or my guilt of being there knowing that I wasn’t worthy to be there, but that was the most spiritual and mental experience I have ever had in my life, up to that point.  I didn’t know what to do so I talked to my leader and told him how I essentially lied my way through my interviews to go on my mission.  He talked to the MTC president.  I went home the next day and had to talk to my stake president and tell him everything.  After that, he schedule a disciplinary action and the decision was made to have me disfellowshipped, because of what I had done.

After all of that, I felt so out of tune with myself and didn’t feel worthy enough, or wanted enough for that matter, and felt super judged – whether that be true or a consequence of my own guilt that I was feeling, so I left the church and walked away for the next 12 to 13 years.  After that, I knew deep down that I wasn’t happy no matter what I went through, whether it was relationships, friends, jobs, and even day to day life, I knew something was off, but I did not take the steps to admit what it was to myself and repent of my sins and get back into the church.  I wasn’t strong enough to do it by myself until I met Cheyenne, and within a week of meeting her I knew that this was the person I was going to spend the rest of my life with and she made and makes me a better person and I wouldn’t be here if it wasn’t for her.  She gave me the strength to come back to church and work through the repentance process with her, as she was going through a similar experience and we were able to lean on each other for support.  Once I get back into the church and started to pray daily, before I met with the bishop to talk about things, I realized and gained my testimony back of Jesus Christ, our Savior, and how he has the power to help us out of every condition and situation, regardless of whether we feel close to him.  He still can reach us where we are, as we are.  As reach out to him through faith, he will always be there for us.  Jesus will be ready and willing to take our hands and pull us to safety.

We know the story of Peter, and how he walked on the water to go to Jesus.  As he was walking, Peter began to sink and became afraid.  He cried, saying, “Lord! Save me!”  Jesus immediately stretched out his hand, and pulled him to safety, saying “Oh thou of little faith.  Wherefore didst thou doubt?”  Jesus’s words were not meant to be harsh, but to remind him that he is always there for him, and for us.  Jesus Christ is our rescuer and our redeemer.  No matter how many times we fall, the Savior will be there to reach out his hand and help us succeed.  As we have faith in him, he will save us from our challenges and trials and give us the greatest of all gifts — redemption and eternal life.  With this knowledge that Jesus and Heavenly Father are and always will be there for me, it gave me the strength to push through my guilt and feelings of inadequacy and unworthiness.  In the Savior’s strength, “I can do all things.”

Joseph Smith, the prophet, often spoke of having a feeling of weakness and imperfections.  But part of these feelings are what led him to ponder and pray for answers to his questions that he had in his mind.  This led him to go pray in the sacred grove.  He heard the Lord say, “Joseph, my son, thy sins are forgiven thee, go thy way, walk in my statutes, and keep my commandments.  Behold, I am the Lord of Glory, I was crucified for the world, that all those who believe on my name may have eternal life.”  Joseph’s desire to repent and seek answers helped him come to Christ and receive forgiveness of his sins.  This effort is what started the restoration of the Gospel of Jesus Christ.  This experience that Joseph had shows that feeling weak and inadequate can help us recognize our shortcomings.  If we humble ourselves, this will help us build our faith in Christ and learn to depend on him and have a desire to turn towards him and repent of our sins.

Elder Gerrit W. Gong taught, “Our Savior’s atonement is infinite and eternal.  Each of us try and fall short.  We may for a time, lose our way.  God lovingly assures us that no matter where we are, or what we have done, there is no point of ‘no return’.  He waits ready to embrace us.”  Trials and temptations will come, but we should not wait for things to get hard before we turn to the Savior.  Instead, turn to the Savior daily, no matter where you are at in your life and in your spiritual journey, and focus on the redeeming power of Jesus Christ and Heavenly Father’s desire for us to return to them.  Despite the hardships we will all face, our loving Heavenly Father has designed the plan of happiness so we are not destined to fail.  His plan gives us a way to overcome our shortcomings and failures.  The Lord has said, “This is my work and my glory, to bring to pass the immortality and eternal life of man.”  We should not be surprised or discouraged when trials come to us.  We should face situations with full trust and confidence in the Lord and His plan.

Mosiah 23:22 states, “Nevertheless, whosoever putteth his trust in the Lord, the same shall be lifted up at the last day.”  Paul spoke of having a ‘thorn in the flesh’.  We do not know what his trial or thorn was, but that is of little importance to what we need to take from his story.  The important takeaway from his story is that he struggled and pleaded with the Lord for help, and ultimately the Lord’s strength and power helped him through his trials.

Going back to the my ‘thorn’ I mentioned at the beginning of my talk, I now realize that the Lord was there for me through it all, and he as just waiting for me to reach out my hand to him so he could take hold of it and save me as he saved Peter in the water.  This made me realize that I have always been a person of worth and worthy of God’s love and blessings.  The experiences we go through are part of our journey that allows us to grow and progress towards immortality and eternal life.  God did not send us here to fail, rather to learn and succeed in his plan for us.  Repenting allows us to feel God’s love and to know and love him in ways that we would have never known before.  There is such a mental relief and hope in knowing that we can always try again.

You may be feeling like it is not possible to be forgiven, and that you are an exception to receiving God’s love, just like I felt for over 12 years, but you are never beneath his reach.  President Barney told me that  “True repentance is to have a change of heart.”  To me, my heart was changed because I allowed my Savior to come back into my life and welcome me back onto his fold with open arms.  If you are struggling with things that you feel that you should have overcome by now, or struggling with guilt and inadequacy, do not give up.  Be patient with yourself, repent often, and seek help from church leaders and loved ones, as well as your Father in Heaven.  Our Heavenly Father sees you.  He knows you.  He and the Savior care about you and all that you care about, and they love you.

I am looking forward to being back inside the temple in the future.  We have already started a family, but I am excited grow my family, as well as getting sealed to them for time and for all eternity.  The atonement is a powerful instrument and gift given to us by our Savior, Jesus Christ.  I know that Christ suffered for me, and that he loves me.  I know that this church is true, and that as we live the gospel and keep the commandments of the Lord, we will be together as a family for time and all eternity, through Heavenly Father’s plan.  I know that the Prophet Russell M. Nelson is a prophet of God.  I know that Joseph Smith humbled himself enough to be open to revelation to restore the Church of Jesus Christ, and that if I humble myself, the Lord has a great plan for me as well.  I believe the the Book of Mormon is true, and that it holds the power to bring us closer to the Savior and our eternal happiness.

I say these things in the name of Jesus Christ, Amen.