Political
Jokes
I dare you not to smile or chuckle as you read these quips:
·
The problem with political jokes is that they
get elected. ~ Henry Cate, VII
·
We hang the petty thieves and appoint the great
ones to public office. ~ Aesop
·
If we got one-tenth of what was promised to us
in these acceptance speeches there wouldn’t be any inducement to go to heaven. ~ Will
Rogers
·
Those who are too smart to engage in politics
are punished by being governed by those who are dumber. ~ Plato
·
Politicians are the same all over. They promise
to build a bridge even where there is no river. ~ Nikita
Khrushchev
·
When I was a boy I was told that anybody could
become President; I’m beginning to believe it. ~ Clarence Darrow
·
Why pay money to have your family tree traced;
go into politics and your opponents will do it for you. ~ Author
Unknown
·
If God wanted us to vote, he would have given us
real candidates. ~Jay Leno
·
Politicians are people who, when they see light
at the end of the tunnel, go out and buy some more tunnel. ~ John
Quinton
·
Politics is the gentle art of getting votes from
the poor and campaign funds from the rich, by promising to protect each from
the other. ~ Oscar
Ameringer
·
The Democrats are the party that says government
will make you smarter, taller, richer, and remove the crabgrass on your lawn.
The Republicans are
the party that says government doesn’t work and then they get elected and prove
it. ~ P. J. O’Rourke
·
I offer my opponents a bargain: if they will
stop telling lies about us, I will stop telling the truth about them. ~ Adlai
Stevenson, stump speech, 1952
·
A politician is a fellow who will lay down your
life for his country. ~
·
Any American who is prepared to run for
president should automatically, by definition, be disqualified from ever doing
so. ~ Gore Vidal
·
I have come to the conclusion that politics is
too serious a matter to be left to the politicians. ~ Charles
de Gaulle
·
Instead of giving a politician the keys to the
city, it might be better to change the locks. ~ Doug Larson
·
Don’t vote: it only encourages them. ~ Author
Unknown
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